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Selected Poems of Steven Curtis Lance

Displaying Poems 2426 thru 2450 of 2821 Poems

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Jun 22, 2005, 11:20 pm

Transcendental Sonnet #1402:

Once I was believed to be anointed
To do important things before I die
Then I was fifty and disappointed

A failure who could only speculate
Somehow I knew I would never know why
This is that special cruelty of fate
Causing us to wonder as we blunder
Searching for some answer as the cancer
Eats away today and then tomorrow
Is our last and still there is no answer
Which is because there simply never was

So what is left of me? This poetry
Thousands of poems which I leave to you
Debris of a dream which never came true

+Steven Curtis Lance

Copyright MMV

Jun 21, 2005, 10:05 pm


Tasting sweet apples in my mouth
Inhaling roses from the south
While summer wind plays in my hair
No far no near but only here
No fair no unfair and no there
No up above no down below
No past no future and no fear

This is it this is all I know
More than enough for me in which
To be complete and to be rich
Call me a bastard or a b*tch
Call me whatever you want to
But your hollow heart will haunt you

Jasmine tea is enough for me
My jasmine blossoms bloom at night
In my backyard by full moon light
Open your eyes and you might see
Open your heart and you might feel
This is it this is what is real

+Steven Curtis Lance

Copyright MMV

Jun 21, 2005, 6:00 pm

The Moon and Me

I have followed the moon from night to night
Have tracked her sky to sky from near to far

Like me she is a fugitive in flight
Choosing to stay where the mysteries are
By cover of darkness soft and sable
The moon and I have always been able
To do what we please and bring to their knees
The arrogant who think they know better

And we two utterly confound them by
Moonbeam and letter breaking the fetter
Of ignorance and narrowmindedness
Which they would use against the moon and I
Could never understand their ways unless
These fools imagine they can bind the sky

Well they cannot and they forgot that we
Are pretty slippery the moon and me

+Steven Curtis Lance

Copyright MMV

Jun 21, 2005, 7:42 am

Summer Solstice Song

The longest of seasons
The season of the sun
For so many reasons

The best

And now it has begun
Not a moment too soon
Both bright sun and full moon


Longest day shortest night
The season of the light
By which now everyone

Is blessed

Summer! Come shine on me
Whether bright moon I see
Or blazing sun that we
All of us now may be


+Steven Curtis Lance

Copyright MMV

Jun 21, 2005, 2:43 am

One of Those Little Surprises

A stalagmite in my freezer rises
Formed drip by drop up from the frozen floor
This is one of those little surprises
Which lacking a cogent why and wherefore
Can only make us ask and speculate
As to what it might mean as it is seen
Growing daily as relentless as fate
Inscrutable and cold and crystalline

Today it is beginning to prevent
My access to the coffee can behind
It seems so serious and so intent
Upon its growth as if possessed of mind
I touch it with respect in greeting when
I visit as intruder to its lair
Have tea instead and leave the coffee then
I know not what it means: but it is there

+Steven Curtis Lance

Copyright MMV

Jun 20, 2005, 8:35 am

Transcendental Sonnet #1401:
Faraway Friend

Faraway friend there is nothing we lack
Nothing divides us not distance nor place
Time-travelers you forward and I back
Both east and west and up and down with grace

Two souls who understand themselves are free
To navigate transcending time and space
To understand each other and to be
Together whether noon white new moon black
Or any of the shades of blue between

No matter how we soar we cannot fall
And only we who know know what we mean
We rise and set together with the sun
And with the moon we wax and wane as one

My friend you are not faraway at all!

+Steven Curtis Lance

Copyright MMV

Jun 19, 2005, 7:58 am

Transcendental Sonnet #1400:
Speaking Silence

So there we stood face to face
Not future nor past at last
At the same time and same place
And speaking silence followed
Louder than a startled shout
A pregnant pause which swallowed
Whatever remained of doubt

So there we go at least we know
A thing or two of me and you
We both did our best on the test
At least we went on with the show
And until then we never knew
So there we stood and there we go
Late-season blossoms red and blue

+Steven Curtis Lance

Copyright MMV

Jun 18, 2005, 10:53 pm

Mortality and I Agree

Time wakes me as gravity shakes me
I get older with each passing day
And I might as well just accept it
It is either that or pass away

And should I presume to reject it
Then I would see it rejecting me
To be so bold as to not get old
But never to get ahead as dead
Time will never stop until I drop
Will not wait no matter what I say

So I say go ahead bring on these days
As well as everything this lengthening
Of days brings I accept it let it be
But do not choose to lose my childish ways
An old-souled child whose curiosity
Makes me go with the flow where it takes me

+Steven Curtis Lance

Copyright MMV

Jun 18, 2005, 11:19 am

Some of My Hair Will Still Be There

Some of my hair is no longer there
Not completely missing from one place
Just a little bit from everywhere
Plenty left with which to frame my face
And I will never lose any more
Thanks to my doctor and the drugstore
Finasteride not suicide for me

I mean to live well and all I can
I must age but would do it gracefully
A kind and thoughtful old gentleman
Meaning well avoiding hell and sin
Living according to long-term plan
Having given up cigars and gin
The horse races and gambling places
Never allowing the house to win

Last night some stranger or another
Mistook my young friend for my brother
I see better living through chemistry
And a vegetarian diet
My life is successful if quiet
I might live to see a hundred maybe
And some of my hair will still be there

+Steven Curtis Lance

Copyright MMV

Jun 18, 2005, 8:20 am

Bumblebees and Butterflies

Bumblebees and butterflies
Bumble and flutter by me
Each morning to greet the sunrise
And they never deny me
Their bumble-fly company here
In the late spring of the year

Still after summer's dawn when spring has gone
It is not very hard in my backyard
To see life bumbling and fluttering on
No matter what goes on with humankind
Through greed and folly cruelty and war
Bumblebees and butterflies pay no mind

The lower we sink the higher they soar
Their actions speak more than our words can say
In my eyes bumblebees and butterflies
Could teach humankind to live better someday
Reminding us not to leave balance behind
In the fall as we all bumble-fly away

+Steven Curtis Lance

Copyright MMV

Jun 16, 2005, 11:32 pm

Transcendental Sonnet #1399:
An Honest Gift of Love

My new book is black with a picture of me
On the front and the back in the middle
The letters of the title shine in gold
With my name in foil as the fruit of my toil

The design is suggestive of riddle
And of the secrets those black covers hold
For adventurers whose curiosity
Would lead them astray from the commonday bland
To enigmas of my heart drawn by my hand

I would give everyone my book if I could
Hoping that somehow I might be understood
Something new for the few for those with a true
Heart open hand open mind to understand
An honest gift of love from me to you

+Steven Curtis Lance

Copyright MMV

Jun 15, 2005, 9:20 pm

Dancing Monkey

Once I was told the world was waiting for me
I think it has given up and gone away
Now none adore me and many abhor me
They accept my calls but expect me to pay
And you might agree it would all seem to be
A ridiculous joke in rather poor taste

Whoever is in charge must find me funny
A wanderer walking through a world of waste
Rooting through the rubble looking for money
And able to find less than nothing at all
Neither funny nor money but meaningless
Humpty Dumpty should confess and take the fall

Some cosmic idea of a prank I guess

Evolution or creation
These cruel clever strings I cannot see
Which control this situation
Have made a dancing monkey out of me

+Steven Curtis Lance

Copyright MMV

Jun 14, 2005, 9:31 pm

For Donna and For Scott

to speak the unspeakable
to bear witness for the dead

If I kill myself am I a murderer?
Is it as bad as killing another?
What of interrupted ones who never were?
I have lost a half-sister and half-brother
She to suicide and he to criminal neglect
Is it any wonder then that I do not respect
The father we three share?

I am the last and least

In the belly of the beast
There I have spent my life where
Although unbearable
However terrible it is for me
For Donna and for Scott
It is no more for they are not
To be for them was not to be

I honor you my siblings though unknown
The last and least and lost is left alone

+Steven Curtis Lance

Copyright MMV

Jun 14, 2005, 9:30 am

The Restless Moon

The moon was up early in my backyard
Before the sun went down I saw it shine
Out of its element bone-white and scarred
Standing stark against the startled skyline
Having intruded into afternoon
As if off-course and having come too soon

Yet now that it is night I cannot see
It anywhere and it has gone away
Elusive reclusive as if to play
A game of cat and mouse the moon and me

The two of us appear and disappear
A characteristic both of us share
As when the moon looks down I am not here
And when I look back up it is not there

But it was there this afternoon and I
Might catch it on the other side and soon
When next I look up it might happen by
My fellow wanderer the restless moon
Whose absence I can feel the loss the lack
Moon if you see these words of mine: come back

+Steven Curtis Lance

Copyright MMV

Jun 13, 2005, 7:31 pm

Remember Me Today

I take delight in a change of season
Especially from colder to warmer
A protracted dawn which gives me reason
To greet the latter forget the former
To hope for the best and forgive the rest
Now generally expecting to see
My future prospects match the mercury
Rising under clear blue skies together
Life imitating the artful weather
Which clears away the spring's uncertain haze

The bright sun somehow makes me feel secure
Brings a certain certainty to my gaze
The answers to my questions seem more sure
I think things might turn out right after all
Until the end of summer when the fall
Returns and turns to winter and will pass
Beneath first leaves then snow this barefoot grass
Before the winter bears us all away
I grasp the golden promise of the sun
And when fall chills this summer now begun

When winter kills remember me today

+Steven Curtis Lance

Copyright MMV

Jun 13, 2005, 3:10 am

Transcendental Sonnet #1398:
Sunday Sundown

My doctor sent me a poem today
The first of his he has ever shown me
And my lawyer carried me far away
Back to the Vietnam of memory

My neighbors would gladly give me a ride
To an honest mechanic I know of
Should Grandpa's '65 Chrysler decide
Not to start and need to be shown some love

When I come home my cat is waiting here
For me where I can see that I belong
My sense of place is well-defined and clear
And my identity has been forged strong

Here in this place where I was meant to be
My origin my home my destiny

+Steven Curtis Lance

Copyright MMV

Jun 12, 2005, 6:14 pm

Going Public: Too Sensitive?

My friends all say I am too sensitive
Unkind ones get to me too easily
If there is anyone under the sun
More fragile than me I have yet to see
One and in give and take I am all give
How is it then that in the cosmic plan
Someone like me ends up a public man?

As others scrutinize and criticize
I agonize but then I realize
This is my lot in life it is my fate
To be an open book for all to read
And if you do then I appreciate
It and I hope we meet each other's need


Despite my sensitivity I still write quite a lot
I maximize what little I am given or have got

And now

In predicting my obituary I can be specific
I am sure someday someone someway will use the word "prolific"

+Steven Curtis Lance

Copyright MMV

Jun 12, 2005, 5:08 am


The street is full of potholes
I suddenly realize
An emotional shakedown
The fence is full of knotholes
All suddenly filled with eyes
Another nervous breakdown
In the making

I can feel the memories
In the shaking
Of my hands at times like these
In the breaking
Of these icicles tinkling
At my bleeding feet
As frozen tears are sprinkling
Down the snaking street

I fall into a pothole
And I disappear
You watch me through a knothole
Far away from here
The stars are falling
I am too
And I am calling
Calling you

Does it matter
If I shatter?

+Steven Curtis Lance

Copyright MMV

Jun 11, 2005, 5:54 pm

Red and Blue I Love You

Flag Day MMV

A poet in a troubled country at the edge of time
I seek to speak the truth albeit stylized and in rhyme
One state two state red state blue state we all wait for the spring
Which some would force to hurry up the return of the king
Dysphoric dysthymic democracy of thee I sing

While patient red state readers sigh and pass on to the next
Blue staters dig and delve to find themselves within the text
Of these the strange creations of this the strange creator
Just little old me your pencil-wielding gladiator
And I mean no one any harm I only would keep warm

But if you warm a little too just know that I love you
Red and blue with some white between if you know what I mean

+Steven Curtis Lance

Copyright MMV

Jun 11, 2005, 4:39 am

Not Anymore

(literary politics on another site)

Every Friday he games the system
Guilt-tripping fellow authors to reply
But from now on I mean to resist him
Becoming an honest man as I die
And only say what I feel like saying

He should hope that I say nothing at all

It sickens me and I feel like staying
Away from shallow popularity
Transactional and fractional at best
Flying high now but headed for a fall
He will never make a monkey of me

I will not fail now if this is a test
The time has come for him to realize
I was not born to gratify a bore
Ask me no questions I will tell no lies
Not anymore I am no whore not anymore

+Steven Curtis Lance

Copyright MMV

Jun 10, 2005, 9:32 pm

A Boy and His Cat

Some people like to see their cats as wild
To see the lion in the housecat's eyes
But Freddie Noodles is my fellow child
A friendly lion in a handy size

Our interspecies relationship is
Mutually beneficial and his
Interest in my welfare is genuine
All the time I spend with him is time spent in
Good company my Freddie Noodles and me

Should we disagree telepathically
The problem is solved very soon and resolved
For we have evolved into the best of friends
Justifying each others means and ends

I find him to be the best housemate for me
Never a word in anger spoken
Never a promise made nor broken
A boy and his cat and that is that
Which is by any other name as sweet

A happy household of boy and cat
Where both of us always land on our feet

+Steven Curtis Lance

Copyright MMV

Jun 10, 2005, 1:41 am

A Sense of Place

145 N. Cleveland St., Orange, CA 92866 USA

I need to be here where I belong
But I am not here because I need
Nor even because I belong here
It is just that I have always been

Here is where I feel a sense of place
I have never found myself elsewhere
But I found they did not want me there
That this is my point in time and space

I believe this and belief is strong
As the fragile fantasy I feed
By faith my memory tear by tear
Everlasting blooming evergreen

This place this moment belongs to me
And yet I can no longer bear it
I wish there were someone to share it
If only to see how good it can be

To share in the grace of a sense of place

+Steven Curtis Lance

Copyright MMV

Jun 9, 2005, 9:50 am

Coming Around the Corner

In November
There was something I wanted to say
I remember
But no one would listen anyway
So I forgot
And I cannot remember today
But I am not
Important and it does not matter
What I say today or any day at all
Memory seems a curse
I am small and was forgotten in the fall

Things go from bad to worse
I cannot remember anything
Nor can I bear to now
I only hope that summer will bring
Sweet mindlessness somehow
I will lie in the sun
And forget what was done
In November
Since waiting just out of sight impatiently
Is December
Coming around the corner for you and me

+Steven Curtis Lance

Copyright MMV

Jun 8, 2005, 8:41 am

Echoes and Embraces

I accept that I am meant to be alone
The truth hurts but I take it with a sigh
That I have no mate and it must be my fate
To be solitary although not unknown
I intend to be noticed before I die

You will hear of me someday early or late
Although you laugh at me and wonder why
Anyone would notice me since no one cares
To be with me but destiny will show you
That someday you will know me as I know you

Look at this page and tell me whose name it bears

Consider whose work you hold within your hands
Echoes in your mind embraces your heart
Do you realize that someone understands
You? Someone has already become a part
Of you and a spirit has joined with your own?

I accept that I am meant to be alone
But it is also true I am alone with you

+Steven Curtis Lance

Copyright MMV

Jun 7, 2005, 11:01 pm

Transcendental Sonnet #1397: Farmer Sometimes

I weeded my backyard and I feel better
By meeting some primal agrarian need
The spirit of the act and not the letter
The general and not particular weed
I pulled them all nor did I discriminate

By manifest destiny my hand of fate
Acting as grim reaper and it was cheaper
Than having it done and a whole lot more fun
Synthesizing vitamin D in the sun

A Lance as a farmer not wearing armor
With calluses on my unaccustomed hands
Tonight as I write: my neighbor understands
I need to be a farmer sometimes he does too

It works for us and I think it might work for you

Good Morning Mr. Jones!

Expecting your daily grind
You wake up in the morning
And discomfited you find
Overnight without warning
You have gone out of your mind
You notice your worldview starting to decay
And you wonder if you wished your life away

But reality shatters
And it no longer hurts you
That nothing really matters
Society deserts you
But it does you a favor
Because it has no flavor
Or is it perhaps that you never had taste?

And is a mind a terrible thing to waste
Really? Or does no one care?
But you no longer worry
Because you left yours back there
And need no longer hurry
Just to keep up with the Joneses anymore
Because now you know the Joneses are a bore!

Was Me

The father sought to split and call it even
When the sallow sick unwanted baby came
The mother fought to fit and call it Steven
And both of them thought it would die just the same
Yet it did not to everyone's surprise
But grew a fragile child with big brown eyes
In spite of them and Steven was his name

The father's diamond eyes ice-blue and cold
Look from the outside into where he is
The brown-eyed mother never got to be old
But lived through her child and her eyes are his
Eyes of the mother reflected in the son
Who never really has been loved by anyone
Except for her the way they were was beautiful to see

As for the rest he did his best was dutiful: was me


Whoever you were wherever you are
I send you sweet kisses if from afar
Remembering the magic we once shared
You do not love me but are part of me

Because of you I lived and died and dared
To live again so I embrace your pain
Since it is all these empty arms hold now
All you left me except for this bloodstain

You were the best and never mind the rest
So I will take what our fate will allow
And send you sweet kisses if from afar
Whoever you were wherever you are

Transcendental Sonnet #1396: I Embrace My Life (If a Little Late)

The sun has come out much to my surprise
I thought it would be gloomy all day long
But life takes delight in lighting my eyes
And when I feel weak making me feel strong

I just never know what I will see when
I look out my window not until then
Since it is always changing which is nice

None of us ever lives the same day twice
And if I had to do it all again
I would keep the pleasure but also the pain

All of it the way it is was meant to be
There is no way to escape the hand of fate
If I were not like this I would not be me
So I embrace my life (if a little late)

Transcendental Sonnet #1395: Early Saturday in Early June

This early Saturday in early June
The sky is gauzy as it is this time of year
And grey but it will yet be sunny soon
If not today then surely when July gets here

Where I live it is always like this on these days
In early June these grey and gauzy Saturdays
And I recall so many of them all so sweet
Loved and lost at One Forty-Five North Cleveland Street
But here is one today and there will still be more
One day recalled as fondly as the ones before

I think the sun is trying to come out
And I can feel that it is getting warmer now
I want to stand on my front porch and shout
I love you and to feel you love me too somehow

Transcendental Sonnet #1394: Erasers

The school year is ending and pencils sell cheap
At the gigantic grocery store
So I bought a lot of them and stacked them deep
In my Grandma's old wooden desk drawer
Pencils are things which are very hard to keep
Enough of and I always need more

Not the pencils actually
They last as long for me as anyone
It is their erasers you see
Which never last to their end once begun
Confronted by uncertainty
Without erasers I get nothing done

Pencils all over the house with their erasers rubbed flat...
Write with no erasers? Even I am too smart for that...

Remiss Like This

A new friend once observed that I am diffident
Would never force myself on you nor shout
My capabilities unto the trees
And that for an author this seemed different
But I have a great deal to be modest about

I neither interview myself nor toot my horn
Do not doodle my own ding-dong all the day
But would rather listen to you about your kids
And seldom Google myself since I was born
To people without egos who did not believe in ids

...Except for my father who never would bother
With me but we never noticed anyway...

Vanity of vanities! My vanity
Is here somewhere I just cannot find it right now
I misplaced it along with my sanity
Until I find it I can muddle through somehow
Remiss like this but I could sure use a kiss


Monstrosity of a monster's deathwish
Wearing hell's halo and hovering high
Above a ruined planet's deathbed scene
Mushroom cloud like a monstrous jellyfish
Soaring like a damned angel in the sky
Too late to contemplate what might have been
But not too late to mourn what we have lost

Our lives were lies we could not bear the cost
Of being our own gods and holding in
These trembling hands the scales of grace and sin
We dropped them and they clattered from our hands
They shattered and I hope God understands
And who am I you ask me who am I?
Just someone who is too alive to die

So many times I asked you begged you why
But each time and each day all you would say
Is you knew best and I must join the rest
Just keep my eyes down follow and obey
But you have killed my world are killing me
Monstrous jellyfish of a mushroom cloud
I never knew what could make you so proud

But now I see you grin in victory
A monster's deathwish a monstrosity

Seeds of Destruction

Here on the outside looking in
Defeated before we begin
Stand victims of the culture wars
As ours is victimized by yours
Of course you say yours is divine
I wonder therefore what is mine?

That would be the opposite I suppose
But only your God in your heaven knows
Who tells you not to judge us but you fudge
You know you are right and you never budge

Except when it fits your flexible fancy
Which makes your certainty certainly chancy
But that is just me espousing heresy
And of course as for you we know what is true
Hypocrisy as far as the eye can see
You make the rules so you get to break them too

There on the inside looking out
"Might makes right" was not very bright
"Shock and awe" was the lock we saw
The rock on which you broke the law
Seeds of destruction seeds of doubt
Now sprout as you turn out the light

Goodnight my conquerors sleep tight


The void where the one I loved used to be
From which she tore herself with violence
Is one which cannot heal apparently
A wound which defies all medical sense
Or any other kind of sense at all
A black hole into which all else is drawn
A dead star all-consuming in this fall
From which I wish to wake to find it gone

Yet from this hollow heart it never will
Be gone nor lessen but always remain
Suspending me thus terminally ill
To know that I cannot be well again
With only this to count on just this ache
Of emptiness an everlasting pain
Which although all else should my heart forsake
Will always be yet not be here with me

The void where the one I loved used to be

Little Underestimated Me

To swim upstream to stubbornly resist
The obvious defy all common sense
Which says that it is hopeless to persist
Against such grim determined and intense
Unequal opposition as though fate
Itself had set its jaw against me now
I bet my life that it is not too late
That there is still a chance for me somehow

I simply will not give up till I win
For I have come too far to turn away
I fight to the finish once I begin
And I will win no matter what they say
I have a lot of fight left in me still
Though I might only make one step a day
Step by step I will take another hill
And no one will taste sweeter victory

Than little underestimated me

Transcendental Sonnet #1393: Tonight As I Look Back Upon Today

Tonight as I look back upon today
I remember twenty-four hours ago
I saw no hope could imagine no way
For happiness I simply could not know
Could not begin to see how I could be
Within this quiet place I am of light
I never dreamed tonight I would be free

The sun goes down but does not bring the night
After itself as if to close the door
The moon is rising and I hope for more
Hope rises whether sun or moon I see
Faith lights a candle whether rich or poor
And love will bloom at midnight inside me
Tonight with hope and faith to light the way

Transcendental Sonnet #1392: You Will Know When

Neither before nor after but only
When the moment arrives and only then
At the time appointed to the lonely
Comes the companion and you will know when

But there is nothing for it but to wait
No mortal can reset the clock of fate
Stronger arms than mine timeless and divine
Move turning hands to sweep across the face
Of what has been what is and what will be

The challenge we face is to meet with grace
Surprises borne within the mystery
When the moment arrives and only then
Hidden in those hands as for you and me
Comes the companion and you will know when

Transcendental Sonnet #1391: Decoration Day

Memorial Day MMV

Our old flag from the Second World War
Stands at attention by the front door
Home alone here where my mother grew
Up in those days of red white and blue
To marry a man I never knew
Who fought in that war and then one more
And boxed and drilled and wrote poetry
Between and afterward fathered me

Grandma called this Decoration Day
Family would come from far away
And we would take them to the graves of
Those we remember honor and love
Decorating them with memories
As the ravens watched us from the trees

Dreams: Crossing Time and Death and Space

for Patricia Lance (1934-1998) my mother my friend

Whenever I sleep I dream
Of my mother who has been
Gone from this earth for seven
Years now but lately I seem
So lost as to what things mean

I know she is in heaven
But I dream of her each night
Maybe just a little light
Escapes from where she is to
Where I am in darkness here
Since I hate to bother you
With my loneliness and fear

Does this mean somehow she sees
My life go from bad to worse
And in moments such as these
From across the universe
Lets me know that she is there?

I know my mother would care
That she would not forget me
My father may regret me
All I do is bother you
But love can go anywhere
Crossing time and death and space
To dry these tears from my face

+Steven Curtis Lance

Copyright MMV


Displaying Poems 2426 thru 2450 of 2821 Poems

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