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Selected Poems of Steven Curtis Lance

Displaying Poems 1751 thru 1775 of 2785 Poems

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Mar 2, 2007, 5:44 pm


Little Big Boy!

Thirty years old and going nowhere fast
I know because I have been there before
If this is your chance it might be your last
Inflated by our worship now to soar

But I am an unbeliever in you:
I think you are an enormous baby

If you have a dream it might not come true
Can you keep your trophy lover? Maybe
But I think she might be part of the crew
Of a ship which never sails anywhere
Fortunately you are too vain to care

Just call your mother and she will explain
Or better she could tell you over lunch
(For which she pays of course) about how pain
Could make you more thoughtful in what you do
And what Ecstasy has done to your brain

Little Big Boy! Mommy loves you a bunch!
She just wants you to be happy at last!

But baby you are living in the past

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Mar 1, 2007, 9:32 pm


Visual Reality

Cud-chewing on her exit line
She had an inspiration:
Show righteous indignation!

She decided that would be fine
That whatever she said was not
The point of it but rather what
And how effective the effect

Correct just as one might expect
In visual reality
A ray of hope for the elect
Who having eyes use them to see
Her exit line although banal
Effect-effective after all

But we who wonder with our words
Would like our words to matter
Appreciated like the birds
As pleasant background chatter
One hopes and at the very least
A word be heard in season when
We all have lost our reason then

Cud-chewing on my exit line
I have an inspiration:
Show peaceful resignation

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Mar 1, 2007, 7:56 am


Broken

Is it still a poem if it is broken?
I can only write a broken poem now
As a broken poet in a broken house
Where things are done which can never be spoken
By unsentimental people who know how
To destroy what must seem like a broken mouse
To them just the doomed and forsaken heir of
A personalized death at the unclean hands
Of these conquerors none of whom understands
They poisoned me with suffering killed my love
And destroyed first my home then my sanity

Should I have sold when I was told and fled when
It got so cold and I got old and bled then
With memories of scenes like these? To bed then
(My cat and I) afraid to die but still more
Afraid of my life and what I lost it for
Hiding in my bedroom behind the locked door

Father have mercy on your wandering son
Receive my soul and spare my children from this
Take me home to my true home grant the sweet kiss
Of your forgiveness to this your broken one
It simply hurts too much now for me to be
I want to see my Grandma see my mother
And my Grandpa who loved me like no other
I gave my all but nothing is left for me
Where things are done which can never be spoken
As a broken poet in a broken house
I can only write a broken poem now

Is it still a poem if it is broken?

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Feb 28, 2007, 12:52 am


Suddenly Now

Every single morning is a victory
Every time the sun comes up I feel I win
To be anywhere is a good place to be
As good as any so let this day begin
The rest of my life all of a sudden now
And let it be as great as fate will allow

I came late to the table I realize
With the time left to me not what it once was
The great clock of the universe is running
But adventure still beckons in every size
As to the end things spin out from the first cause

The view from anywhere is still as stunning
As ever it was this morning because of
All of the things which have always made it so
Things felt more than seen like hope and faith and love
As if questions the answers to which I know

I only get this one chance in the world here
So I might as well enjoy it after all
After half a lifetime of living in fear
It might just be time for some dragons to fall
So let me be as great as fate will allow
As the rest of my life comes suddenly now

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Feb 27, 2007, 12:35 pm


Existential Baseball

This is an existential baseball game
Twi-night double-header extra innings
Nobody wins but nobody to blame
I lost and now must pick up my winnings

I see everybody else lost the same
As me but they don't realize it yet
The scoreboards are wrong whatever they say
I just take the winnings of my losing
And vow to remember never to bet
On some insane game not of my choosing
Ever again just head the other way

(Why does this sort of thing happen to me?)

I heard they won't let anybody leave
That we are spectators here forever
But I will dig my way out day by day
Escape tomorrow or maybe never

I have to do something have to believe
That there was a meaning in here somewhere
And I am too exhausted now to grieve
Anymore at this field of life and death
Each step between swinging from here to there
I offer back this heartbeat with this breath
And picking up my winnings take strike three

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Feb 26, 2007, 4:37 am


New Pants in a Spacetime Anomaly

From mirror to mirror before and behind
High-stepping reflections step out of my mind
In a chorus line although I never dance
Like that but truth be told never had the chance
Before somehow but I am doing it now
With all the grace which two dimensions allow

Anyone could look good if the light is right
But I had no intention to dance tonight
So I am surprised to see me supersized
Multiplied and stretching to infinity
Yet I see who is dancing and it is me
Inscrutably if stylishly realized

I came here with the most mundane intention
I just wanted to try on a pair of pants
And the dressing room man forgot to mention
How these magic mirrors make one preen and prance
But even if I never come out again
There are worse ways to go and there is no pain:

"In multiplicity for eternity
With new pants in a spacetime anomaly
Dressing Room Eight presents: Steven Curtis Lance"

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Feb 25, 2007, 7:00 am


Gone

When the night opens its arms to receive
A wanderer otherwise deeply lost
Something within him begins to believe
That it was worth it whatever it cost
That whoever he is will be all right
Being embraced in the arms of the night

A good night's journey and a good day's rest
Although he is not going anywhere
The wanderer looks to the flaming west
At dusk and then the burning east at dawn
But he has already been here been there
And more than anything likes to be gone
Just to look up into the sky and stare
To the night's dark heart where the bright stars shine
And see he has been granted his request
"What lies in-between dusk and dawn is mine"

You never know when you get home until
The scattered things gather and then you feel
The rightness of it and he always will
Find home in the dark which the stars reveal
He prefers midnight to the dusk and dawn
And more than anything likes to be gone

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Feb 24, 2007, 11:05 pm


I Hope

Although today I feel like hell
No stupid sickness can drop me
I hope tomorrow to be well
And not let anything stop me

Should anybody wonder why
My hope defies mortality
I live by curiosity
And still too curious to die
No choice remains me but remain
To get things done to see them through
To ask the questions once again
And maybe get some answers yet

If anybody will I bet
I will although I have to do
My best to make my hope come true
Now having seen how time can fly
But hopeful as I ever was
And just a little stubborn too
I think I can survive because
I feel too curious to die

Of course I also feel like hell
But called by curiosity
My hope defies mortality
I hope tomorrow to be well

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Feb 23, 2007, 7:29 pm


I Wish I Could Write a Poem Today

(but Happy Birthday to Franziska anyway)

I wish I could write a poem today
But life has ground me down to nothing now
If I could I would make a poem say
The things I find unspeakable somehow
As touching how this life is touching me
Today in a way I find unpleasant
In a word roughly or abusively
And not really worth living at present
Given the disappointment the sorrow
To say nothing of the hopelessness when
Yesterday is gone with no tomorrow
But maybe I can write a poem then
Or the day after or maybe next week

Or maybe it may never be at all
If today is it is too much to speak
The problems too big the poet too small
The chasm between the two yawning wide
As a deep shadow is cast like a pall
As I await the fate of the helpless
As I am devoured by my destiny
Having already piled up poetry
Enough for anybody now I guess
If I could I would make a poem say
The things I find unspeakable somehow
But life has ground me down to nothing now
I wish I could write a poem today

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Feb 21, 2007, 11:47 pm


The Learning Curve

for my friends Aurora Harris, Richard Rohm, and Matt Fisher

I used to enjoy the spinning around
Which life seemed to be at least formerly
But now am being run into the ground
Pursuing freedom finding slavery

Were life some crazy spinning carousel
What started here would finish here as well
But life seems a train run right off the track
Which would not appear to be coming back

Riding for my life on a learning curve
With hairpin turns a shudder and a swerve
And the wonder what I did to deserve
Riding for my life on a learning curve

From the frying pan of conventional
Ideas to the fire of alternative
Realities or unrealities
Manifold and multidimensional

I find myself challenged by times like these
And glad I am not a conservative
Those are the ones who are really upset
Not even seeing what has happened yet

I used to enjoy the hustle and flow
Of life on the fly as it barrels by
Of not knowing where it is that I go
But getting there just along for the ride

I see now it is true that I must die
And what a spectacular accident
It smells like someone has already died
As from a distance I hear the lament

The locomotive careens crazily
The cars fall on their sides this way and that
I wonder if that lament is for me
And whether I should get my coat and hat

No: I will ride to the end of the line
Although there is no line here anymore
This railroad is crazy but it is mine
Although I never knew what it was for

Riding for my life on a learning curve
With hairpin turns a shudder and a swerve
And the wonder what I did to deserve
Riding for my life on a learning curve

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Feb 21, 2007, 3:29 am


Old Soldier

Once he was really someone long ago
It was amazing what he did back then
He has a story but no one to know
Who he used to be in the way-back-when
He refuses to talk about it now
Bearing his secrets to the grave below

So no one knows exactly as to how
It was that destiny chose him to be
A hero but he is a hero still
And if he were to talk he might well say
Those who were there never talk never will
Old soldiers do not die they fade away

He lost his heart in the Second World War
He bet it all and never won it back
Still marching but only he knows what for
I wonder what he thinks about Iraq

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Feb 19, 2007, 9:40 pm


Sick Enough

When you get sick enough nothing matters
As the world shrinks down to heartbeat and breath
One criticizes another flatters
While I am trying not to cough to death

Exhausted I wonder how to make it
Till my doctor's appointment on Tuesday
But people smile at me and I fake it
Still trying to act all right anyway

Unable to buy an aspirin now
I wish that I had gotten my flu shot
As muddling through the best I can somehow
I lie to people and say I forgot

When the truth is I was too sad to care
Back then if I got a flu shot or not
But the complications are terrible
So much so I despair of making it

Waiting is becoming unbearable
And now I am finding that faking it
Becomes impossible this far along
Since sickness is stronger than we are strong

It bears us away at the close of day
A stupid way to commit suicide
But a poetic way to fade away
And more efficient than other ways tried

When you get sick enough nothing matters

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Feb 18, 2007, 10:51 pm


The Art of Poetry

When the subject of the poem cannot be
Determined at all at least not precisely
Because it is nothing less than everything
And so instead has to be experienced
Rather than read felt by flesh like a bee sting

When that is the sort of a poem you find
In which everything at once is referenced
Which speaks not only to the heart but the mind
And deeper to plumb seas of reality
Or unreality not that you must choose

When you see the magic which nobody sees
And when the roulette wheel will not let you lose
So you are left satisfied yet wanting more
When the poem like an incantation frees
All sorts of things you never thought of before

A hidden door opening to galaxies
The summer the winter the fall and the spring
All things all at once in the dance of the ring
Then you have tasted the art of poetry
Which art is the art I have chosen for me

Because it is nothing less than everything

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Feb 17, 2007, 2:46 pm


Shot by Cupid

If you still want to be shot by Cupid
Then go ahead but I think it's stupid
I never take his arrows anymore
Since having been shot by Cupid before
Turned out to be such painful injury
My heart like Humpty Dumpty in free fall
And having avoided cupidity
I would prefer not to be shot at all

I've lived too close to couples who tussle
Claw like cats in the hustle and bustle
Of gross dysfunction and indignity
If that's what coupling is it's not for me
And what of those couples with peaceful ways?
One of them does what the other one says
While others shout what they say together
Loudly in stridently stormy weather

If you still want to be shot by Cupid
Nothing I say will stop you anyway
Until you too end up feeling stupid
And duped like me at the end of the day

My good old cat and I will be just fine
The next heart shot by Cupid won't be mine

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Feb 14, 2007, 7:33 pm


For Right Now

Happy to be here and there
After all at this late hour
Happy to be anywhere
Still with style still without power
Happy still in any case
Still to care and not to care
To exist in any place

Do I know where I might be
Tomorrow or the next day?
Someone might know but not me
Living here or passed away
Sailing or else cast to sea
Ashes into memory
Still I will have had my say
Riddled into poetry
Left behind beyond my stay

As long as there are stars in
The sky to wink at our sin
I might as well enjoy me
No one else can destroy me
So the thing to do is be
Happy to be here and there
To exist in any place

Happy to be anywhere
For right now in any case

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Feb 13, 2007, 2:24 pm


Stop

I worry that having failed in the war
Now having completely destroyed Iraq
This administration will look for more
Shenanigans to make and carry on
Pretty much more of the same to Iran
Now on the ledge to go over the edge
Taking us too far to ever come back

Will the people wake up and prove willing
Seeing the president's ship going down
To end this endless cycle of killing
While we bury beautiful kids from town?
Take back the future from the unclean hand
Which stole it and can never understand
That to increase the war cannot bring peace

Peace must be nurtured and grown patiently
And for it to bloom the bleeding must cease
Preemptive war used to be viewed as sin
But they have forgotten diplomacy
Now from a distance they send our kids in
I worry that having failed in the war
This administration will just make more

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Feb 13, 2007, 4:38 am


Dry Flowers

I

Only a heartbeat at a time
Only a breath from death
Only a soft bamboo windchime
Carried on the sky's breath

II

One wants love one needs to be kissed
One craves human propinquity
Lest the point of it all be missed
One who is one is me

III

At the end now they are alone
Pickled and fit to die
Soon they will be gone who have known
So well to live a lie

IV

My upbringing was a warning
The worthless feel most worth
I must get up in the morning
And go and save the earth

V

The lavender ribbon she wore
A cloth of gingham check
Was like some fruit a lotus bore
Delicious on her neck

VI

Only a stubborn stunted star
On a very dark night
I never meant to come this far
But I still have my light

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Feb 12, 2007, 10:04 pm


Answered

On the threshold of the introitus
He hesitated suddenly
Having second thoughts about coitus
A rite of passage he could see
Into a world of complication
Something in him wanted to flee
Causing his lover consternation

But nature told him "those who love are free"
As his lover smiled encouragingly
And this was nature doing what she does
Because she knows how these things tend to be
And that it had to be the way it was
From Adam even as it was for me
Experience answers expectation

Where all the answered questions disappear
Nature answered without explanation
The best time is now and the best place here
Having transcended anticipation
We see the folly of anxiety
Answered by nature not quite as we plan
Where yin and yang join a woman and man

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Feb 11, 2007, 8:50 pm


Why We Wander

Some say sublimation is evolution
As solitary souls make restitution
Anonymously or nearly so like me
For the familial happiness of all
That the human family advance nor fall
For want of such sublime singlemindedness
Of single sublimators like me I guess

Some say this is a pretty good way to be
Alone but not lonely in the company
Of some quixotic quest if though on Skid Row
Above people make love while we work below
Their window for the good of humanity
Out here on the street where sublimators beat
Our heads against the brick walls of convention

We do not do this merely for attention
But to advance the dance of the family

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Feb 10, 2007, 11:30 pm


Chances Are

The existential emptiness
That feeling of being alone
Gnaws us down to despair unless
What lies beyond remains unknown

I don't know and I never will
Until it comes and passes by
What lies beyond my window sill
Or on the dark side of the hill

I feel like I'm so unprepared
I'm sad I'm worried and I'm scared
But I guess I'll just muddle through
And do my best for now then die

I hope it all works out for you
The way you want but chances are
We might get close but no cigar
I guess it always hurts to try

But it gives us something to do

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Feb 10, 2007, 12:04 am


Like it or Not

My poetry is not quite what it seems
The most important parts are unspoken
The imagery of fantasies and dreams
May seem fragile but remains unbroken

Something you might not have thought of before

You may never know me nor I know you
Yet we share and I have things to show you
Gathered into books where you can see more
Buy one and give it to your library

And there I will be right there on your shelf
Exposing your town to strange poetry
In which the poet exposes himself
Without giving all his secrets away

I hide myself inside this poetry
Without exposing all the rest of me
Writing myself down here as if to say
Like it or not this seems the best of me

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Feb 8, 2007, 6:38 am


Eccentric

When they asked me what I wanted to be
When I grew up back when I was a kid
I answered them unhesitatingly
That my destiny seemed quite plain to me
To be eccentric (whatever I did)

And as it seemed then so it is today
I turned out something like I thought I would
Eccentric if not insane all the way
But the lotus unfolded as it should
To bloom the brighter as my hair turns grey

So who's to say eccentric isn't good?
The further you float from society
And the less you care about what "they" say
The easier it becomes to break free
And make your own rules for this game you play

Your own game which no one has played before
And if no one else understands the rules
Soon enough you won't need them anymore
Whatever you do don't be like those fools
With no sense of absurdity at all

Now that to me would be insanity
I'd rather be a lotus in the fall
Being eccentric (whatever I do)
Unfolding as I should but I might see
If maybe I could find a friend like you

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Feb 7, 2007, 6:53 am


Magical Morning

Something about this sparkling weather
Makes it difficult to be depressed
Out here walking I wonder whether
Anyone could fail to be impressed
Encountering nature's heartfelt kiss

All I can say is it suits me fine
Here in February to be dressed
Up in a deep sense of the divine
On a magical morning like this

I try to tread lightly on the grass
Eating no meat wearing no leather
Hoping the kiss might more freely pass
Between ultimate reality
And such reality as is mine
But let everyone live as they please

Out here walking I wonder whether
Anyone could fail to be impressed
Especially on mornings like these
Something about this sparkling weather
Makes it difficult to be depressed
Dressed up in a deep sense of the divine

All I can say is it suits me fine

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Feb 5, 2007, 10:36 pm


Yesterday's Elephants

When the moon stands stark white against the night
The blue velvet of ancient memory
I remember some hope I see some light
And I tell myself what will be will be
But whatever happens I will be fine
Forged in the crucible of suffering
Nothing can overcome this soul of mine
Fashioned to survive all and everything
By one who has suffered much more than me

The absurd circus parade passes by
Yesterday's elephants trumpeting past
What they leave on the street is all at last
I stepped in it once and learned pretty fast
The passing parade's unreality
Means little or nothing to me as I
See the moon stand stark white against the night
The blue velvet of ancient memory
I remember some hope I see some light

And I tell myself what will be will be

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Feb 5, 2007, 4:48 am


The Ring

Autumn into winter into spring
Summer into autumn as the ring
Turns round once more as it has before
From here to here in another year
Always marked from autumn as the fall
Is the best time to begin to rise

I always like autumn best of all
But shiver under these winter skies
Till upside down autumn springs for me
Bringing back sunshine and greenery
As light to these winter-darkened eyes
Which though opened sometimes fail to see

Autumn into winter into spring
Summer into autumn as the ring
Turns round not quite as it has before
From here to there into everything
Everything I need and nothing more
Eyes though opened sometimes fail to see

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII











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Displaying Poems 1751 thru 1775 of 2785 Poems

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