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Selected Poems of Steven Curtis Lance

Displaying Poems 1701 thru 1725 of 2793 Poems

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May 29, 2007, 2:12 am


Whole

I think we play roles
To fill up the holes
Torn out from our souls
By injuries sustained along the way
And so we engage in our shadow play

I went to the holy woman and said
I could play no more and wished to be dead
But she healed and anointed me instead

So here I am now
Not quite knowing how
Yet somehow believing that I must live
That my creator delights to forgive
And welcome me a prodigal home free

You might not believe me but watch and see
That soon within the blue moon I will rise
Surprising my own disbelieving eyes
Opening now to my birthright my prize
By which I am blooming nightwings to soar

I have sung before but you will hear more
Deeply of me as I sing destiny
The moon is waxing I am growing strong
My birth approaches nor will it be long
Until created I create my song

No more role no more hole not in this soul
As I rise blue moon soon strong free and whole

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








May 27, 2007, 10:13 pm


In the Firmament Between Always and Never

I used to think that life was like a mountain and
For the first half we climbed steadily toward the top
From which like Moses we could see the Promised Land

Followed by a steady imperceptible drop
Which was in its own way a blessing in the end
It was gentle and you could go with one you love

But now like Elijah what if you just ascend
Rising higher and higher above the above
Until you are lifted so high you disappear?

Somehow I think this is what I am doing here
It feels wonderful and scary like a thrill ride
Yet I have completely forgotten about fear

It tingles inside me like infatuation
Whereas I used to sequester myself and hide
Away with myself and my new situation

Now I want to rise gloriously like the sun
The light of life is echoed and expressed in me
The dawning of my eternity has begun

So this then is what it means after all to be
In the firmament between always and never
I will rise with the sun forever and ever

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








May 27, 2007, 12:47 am


I Believe in You

I thought I was alone
As I wandered out here
Destination unknown
And yet you were so near
Too near for me to see
Right here inside of me

What held me back was fear

Somewhere along the line
Through all my wandering
Somehow I became shy
From all these scars of mine
I won from suffering
Yet could not (would not) die

I never understood

And only God knows why
But I know what is good
I can feel what is true
So this one thing is clear
Within my muddied mind
True friends are hard to find

But I believe in you

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








May 25, 2007, 5:17 pm


Beautiful Complex Humanity

It is not easy to be human but
It can be a lot of fun
Success or failure depends less on what
Than how what we do is done

This is a small world with no place to hide
(There is no "army of one")
So live it with style and enjoy the ride
Of our moment in the sun

Life teaches us that if we sincerely
Respect one another here
We can enjoy our pleasant company
As we throw away our fear
And jump right into the exciting sea
Of beautiful complex humanity

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








May 22, 2007, 8:49 pm


Night's Answers to Day's Questions

Recently I have rediscovered sleep

Given enough Valium and trying
I slip out of my daily clothes and go
Down undiscovered sea lanes of the deep
On night excursions to the dark below
In living simulacrum of dying

Dreams know what daydreams only dream to know
And now I know to love and live my dreams
However unsettling some of them are
I always get home by morning it seems
Though I dive deep and long and wide and far

The silent soundscapes of my dreams restore
Both body and mind to seek and to find
Down in the depths of the unconscious more
Than wakingly possible diving blind
Eyes closed mind open browsing through the night

Night's answers to day's questions put things right

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








May 21, 2007, 10:11 pm


Fair Trade Forgiveness

To be human requires a lot of forgiving
Of oneself and others for meaningful living

I forgive others yet in cruel irony
The hardest person of all to forgive is me

But I can forgive you no matter what you do
Yet who is the hardest for you to forgive? You!

Since we are both human as sister to brother
What if we (in a fair trade) forgave each other?

By this fundamental act of humanity
We would make peace with being human and be free

You forgive me I forgive you then we would try
To live all we can while we can (too soon we die!)

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








May 21, 2007, 12:31 am


Cats on Two and Four Legs

The very best investment I ever made
(I speak not of money because I have none)
Was when my pencil was first to paper laid
And my life as we know it was then begun

I erase more than I write (did you know that?)
And get thinner as my cat gets yet more fat
But everyone knows about Noodles and me
You can Google my cat and see what I mean

Freddie Noodles and I have found poetry
In those dark and lonely places in between
Where other cats on two and four legs never
Would care to look and daresay have never been

But one day I looked there and found forever
And started to share with you what I have seen
All these crazy pieces of my puzzle fit
And it looks like the picture is not quite done

I guess I might as well keep on doing it
I might learn a thing or two and have some fun
If you would like to read over my shoulder
I like some company as I get older

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








May 20, 2007, 5:31 am


Walk Softly

Under the morning and over the night
Here between one and the other I wait
Drifting along from what's wrong to what's right
Wondering about the nature of fate

When I speak of what's right I mean the kind
And caring things the sparks in the dark I
Have found like fireflies out here stumbling blind
Which make me want to live before I die

I want to walk past the selfishness seen
As people hurt one another each day
(If you have been hurt you know what I mean)
I want to walk through life a gentler way
A simpler way much harder than it seems
Walk softly so as not to step on dreams

Wondering about the nature of fate
Drifting along from what's wrong to what's right
Here between one and the other I wait
Under the morning and over the night

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








May 19, 2007, 5:49 pm


Lonely

Given our limited number of days
Brief hours in which we have our chance to shine
This brief span can serve for us as always

I wonder might you share your span with mine?

I realize nothing lasts forever
Except loneliness and maybe never
I understand we are all on our own

But I am lonely and I never had
The love I sought and I have been alone

Maybe these days would seem less bleak less sad
If I knew the love I have never known

I wonder if you feel the way I do

I understand we are all on our own
Except loneliness and maybe never
I realize nothing lasts forever

But might I share these days these hours with you?

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








May 18, 2007, 9:20 am


Return to the Garden

The sky is blue velvet the moon is bone white
In the midnight garden where the dead things sprout
In darkness so dark the cobweb clouds seem bright
An opossum questions with a pointed snout
The surprise of eyes glinting in grey ghost light

Some small and stealthy silver blue stars roll out
Though upside down and backward ready and right
Were it not so mesmerizing I might shout
That I hear ancient voices breathe on the breeze
This could be a night to remember no doubt

Lost things are found on blue velvet nights like these
Where the dead things sprout beneath branches laid bare
By unforgiving time's bone white memories
In skeletal trees sighing softly to me:
"Return to the garden (and wait for me there)"

Should you care to join me perhaps we could be
Alone as our own Adam and Eve to see
Secrets which have never been meant to be seen
Where the dead things sprout nowhere yet everywhere
The Eve to my Adam will know what I mean

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








May 14, 2007, 12:56 am


Or...

If unique is what you seek I am your man
If polite is your delight you might like me
I get along with me and I bet you can
If you can embrace my eccentricity
And have some of your own for me to embrace
An eccentric partnership can be begun

If you like to start your day without a plan
Meeting life in the moment and face to face
I am sure we will get along swimmingly
We can have a pleasant run have lots of fun
Then you will see how refreshing it can be
To leave each other laughing when we are done

Or... who knows? We two might be each other's "One"

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








May 13, 2007, 7:49 am


Mother's Day Meditation

By love I came to be
Life left its navel scar
My mother to her son
To mark the moment I
Arrived though she has gone
Compass and natal star
Her gift of life to me
A link within the chain

Though I have fallen far
So I have risen high
And so I fall to rise
Still higher than before
And so I realize
That I was meant to soar
The higher for the fall
Which lifts me after all

The wheel of destiny
Turns slowly one to one
Unending unbegun
Life left its navel scar
My mother to her son
Compass and natal star
And so I rise again
A link within the chain

By love I came to be

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








May 12, 2007, 8:00 am


Crystal Blue Sun Sky

Out of the crystal blue sun sky of May
Where roses bloom and fountains rise and fall
Hope came and sat down beside me today
I brought with me a heavy load of fear
But set it down and I will leave it here
Where roses bloom and fountains fall and rise
I think I just might make it after all

The weather has done something to my eyes
So that the world looks better than before
It takes a day like this to realize
Out of the crystal blue sun sky of May
Although the universe seems cold and vast
Who has the blue sun sky needs nothing more
The weather suits my clothes today at last

Hope came and sat down beside me today
And I can feel myself warmed through and through
Forgotten lies the future with the past
One comes one goes and both of them too fast
Right now is how I want to be with you
Right here is where we are and what we do
Right now right here one moment and one place:

The two of us together face to face

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








May 11, 2007, 5:16 am


Your Steppenwolf

for Franziska

I am a grizzled Steppenwolf now but
I am your Steppenwolf no matter what

Hard traveling unraveling winding
Down dark and dusty roads in parallel
But when we see light it will be blinding
As heaven has the last best laugh on hell

You reach out I reach back and we both feel
By faith if not by sight the hope to heal

Stuck in separate nightmares yet always
Together in one shared and shining dream
Through all these needy nights and lonely days
Nightmares look real but are not what they seem

We have always been together somehow
Never and always never more than now

We both went crazy a long time ago
Or so they tell us in this crazy place
But I went crazy for you as you know
Your golden skin and your lioness face

If this is madness then let madness be
Bond bed and daily bread for you and me

If you are a dream and I wake and die
Alone I will have loved you nonetheless
But I think we can make it if we try
In a blue moon as wolf and lioness

Forget what rats and weasels might have said
We hunted will howl when hunters lie dead

So come out tonight and howl at the moon
With me my golden girl my fantasy
They think they have us cornered now but soon
Your lioness eyes will open to see:

I am a grizzled Steppenwolf now but
I am your Steppenwolf no matter what

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








May 10, 2007, 1:13 am


The Visitation

A brown squirrel out for a stroll on the fence
Outside my bedroom window looked in on me

We both paused a moment in timeless suspense
To regard each other understandingly

She came by to tell me I will be all right
This is how I understood her anyway

As she sat shining gold in the late spring light
She taught me to believe in magic today

And now I await an opossum tonight
To see what a night creature might have to say

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








May 7, 2007, 7:37 pm


Showtime

I might as well live as to die today
Things could get better before they get worse
Might as well laugh as to cry anyway
It makes no difference to a universe
Which seems a shadow play to me daresay
A play in which mine is a minor role
One given me with no chance to rehearse
A bit part but a part of everything

Thrust on the stage to improvise awhile
In the role of my life the play's the thing
I sing for my supper to save my soul
In command performance admission free
Applause the actor's pay my recompense
For making up songs to sing as I sing
A minor star in a far galaxy
Might as well be entertaining and smile

Who knows who awaits in the audience
Among those shadowed faces watching me?
No one came to this show to get depressed
So I must put my mask on and get dressed

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








May 5, 2007, 2:15 am


Surprised by Dawn

a self-published poet's self-published obituary (a little early)

I lived on borrowed money
Then died on borrowed time
The land of milk and honey
Left me without a dime

But... I kissed a girl or two
(Not as pretty as you)
And did what I thought I should
(Such things as I could do)

It surprised me then to see
How far I made it but
Despite all the poetry
I left along the way
Measured by eternity
Not far (no matter what
Those few who loved me might say)

I just did the best I could
With what God gave to me
And some of you understood
Who took the time to see
Me for what I was and would
You remember me to be
My afterlife in memory?

I lived my life without a plan
Then I was gone surprised by dawn
A simple... complicated man

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








May 4, 2007, 2:45 pm


Just Poetry

He has a prescription for Vicodin
But it interferes with his vodka so
He will only take a pill now and then
And a few of the kids around town know
That he has a stash of them and wonder
If he would be willing to sell a few
To them so they could chase their pain away
And put themselves under anaesthesia
They ask me if I have seen him today

Since he is homeless one can never tell
Where he might be and he has amnesia
No doubt from the vodka so I just say
He forgets where he is and would not sell
His pills if they could find him anyway
Whenever he takes one he sleeps so deep
He looks like he is dead there on the ground
I really wish the hospital would keep
Him safe and treat him but he moves around

The last time I saw him I realized
That about all I can do for my friend
Is light his cigarette and hope that he
Will find what he is looking for someday
He and the kids find life painful like me
Everyone wants to be anaesthetized
We are all out looking for love somehow
And a place to call home but in the end
Our lives have become unbearable now

He and I at the end as kids begin
But I am past vodka and Vicodin
So what is left for me? Just poetry

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








May 3, 2007, 11:06 pm


In Utero

Nine months until foreclosure
Nine months in utero
Until full moon exposure
Of what awaits below

Full climax final closure
Five generations go
Down with me to birth depths of
Death aboard this ship I love

Receive me Lord forgive me
The done and the undone
That those next who outlive me
Know as I lost I won

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








May 3, 2007, 3:19 am


Consecration

Deep down in me that part which lives forever
Divine spark or soul or call it what you please
Is turning as I feel my heart rearranged
Beyond this world and all its absurdities
Turning back to poetry now as never
Before feeling I have been profoundly changed

A life is sacrificed in moments like these
And consecrated to that which I must do
To spark into flame which burns me through and through
To sacrifice myself into poetry

For such days as I might have left on this earth
And after whatever hereafter might be
I will mark this moment as my second birth
Suffering having taught me wisely and well
I am bound for glory if only through hell
This is the beginning not the end of me

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Apr 29, 2007, 2:24 am


Outside Inside

The cabbies are out to pick up the drunks
The wanderers too but going nowhere
The poets the paranoids and the punks
Are smoking and some are on fire out there
Or here in this case we do what we do
In this hollow place dreams never come true

We laugh artificially but we weep
Down deep in hurt hearts as cops warily
Shine us their spotlights while businessmen sleep
Tossing and turning with worries of war
And how it might hurt their economy
They have all the money but they want more

Their shiny brass lamps shine elegantly
But they shed no light just darkness and dread
Tomorrow is another day they say
I may look horrid but I am no whore
I never cared for money anyway
Facing foreclosure and forced removal

A homecoming in solidarity
With the homeless hooker by the bookstore
Talking back to the voices in her head
Spare change please spare me your disapproval
She was once a solid citizen too
I heard her hurt and this is what it said:

"A professional prostitute like you
Gets black and blue getting out of the red"
A businessman wakes in a cold sweat now
In his expensive adjustable bed
He saw outside in his nightmare somehow
Some look alive but inside they are dead

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Apr 27, 2007, 2:39 am


Up Up and Away!

I already died once before so why
Should I be afraid to die anymore?
The question is "to be or not to be":
If I choose "be" do I dare to be free
To rise bolder than I dared rise before
Over deep seas colder further from shore?

These wings I have won should suffice to fly
In an upward eastward trajectory
With spirit and stubbornness carry me
Improbably far impossibly high
With no guarantee except one good chance

I feel I am ready to rise again
This night is long but soon might dawn my day
To soar and if it does to have my say
And when I fall I will not fall in vain
If you see some poet surfing the sky
It might just be old Steven Curtis Lance

Stroke? Heart attack? Cancer? I have known worse
Diseases than these no one ever sees
So why not live to rise and meet this day
Streak like a comet through the universe
As high as I can? Up up and away!

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Apr 24, 2007, 6:07 pm


Black-eyed Peas

To eat some black-eyed peas on New Year's Day
Is a worthy if wistful tradition
Said to bring good luck keep bad luck away
To bring better days show humility
And start the new year from a position
Of strength when eaten with the family
From a big pot or only from a can
In a lonely room if you are like me
Or out on the road like a rambling man
By the tracks beneath a cottonwood tree
With a friend who might be rambling your way

I set store by such simple things as these
Although I have stumbled nearly to May
So I ate some black-eyed peas yesterday
A gracious flavor from a friend of mine
Who brought me some hope with some memories
The flavor was earthy the grace divine
Which always helps any day of the year
I thought I might ramble but I might stay
For some black-eyed peas on next New Year's Day
And I will eat them with my friend right here
It never hurts to eat some black-eyed peas

With a friend who might be rambling my way

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Apr 22, 2007, 4:29 am


Jim

A homeless man I once knew had this tattoo
"I Love My Family" inscribed on his chest
It was the only thing he knew to be true
As he tried to forget about all the rest

He told me when he was found dead they would know
He remembered them wherever he might go
He said he sure hoped they would remember him
I hugged him hard and said "I know they will Jim"

Lord have mercy on the wandering man
Men like Jim and me out rambling around
Who have no idea where we might be bound
If no one else will help us Lord you can

Someday when these worn-out bodies are found
I hope they know we loved our families
With broken hearts forgotten tragedies
With broken minds troubled with things like these

Remember us please despite this disease
Which makes us wander lonely through the night
Wanting so much to make our wrong things right
Just out here looking for a little light

Nobody knows why nor what we have to do
Except for us ...but Jim: I remember you

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII








Apr 20, 2007, 11:29 pm


Rite of Passage

Let the hard rain fall
Let it fall on me
And bring down the pall
Of insanity
Wash away my sins
As madness begins

My world has grown dark
I like it this way
My flickering spark
Shines in shades of grey
Shadows everywhere

I no longer care
For the mockery
Of a cruel light
Which I cannot see

Come then bring the night
Come and let it be
My womb and my tomb
Like a secret room

In the dark I see
A hand burning bright
Writing on the wall
Destiny or doom

Now it beckons me
Finding me alone
Now it reckons me
As one of its own

This then is my rite
Of passage to be free
Of a past which now at last
I no longer care to bear
Of a mask worn at half-mast
I no longer swear to wear

You can look for me
But I will not be there
Seek yet never find
(Like me) as I say good night to the day
Which never understood me anyway

Let the hard rain fall
As I slip out of my mind
Let it fall on me
As I leave the day behind

The night is my birthright
It was always there for me
Let the hard rain fall
I have chosen to break free

As I fall into the All
I bid you all good night

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMVII











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