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Selected Poems of Steven Curtis Lance

Displaying Poems 1301 thru 1325 of 2767 Poems

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Jun 6, 2009, 6:49 am


Dream Life

I have not lived much
Not been nor done such
Things as might ought seem

My life is a dream
Sometimes a nightmare
But then dreams are all
We need anyway

Though it might be small
My life has glory
Mounting the stair I
Live a love story

An autumnal day
Passing what and where
And approaching why
Remembering when

And then there was who
In that when of then
But now there is you
To dream life again

I dreamed you to be
And you dreamed me too
Mounting the stair we
Live a love story

Though they might be small
Our lives have glory
We dream gloriously

You dream life with me

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMIX








Jun 1, 2009, 2:07 am


Sunday Afternoon Triptych

I

Even So

love and madness

She is mad: not angry but insane
I never hear from her anymore
Something happened to her shining brain
She is but she is not sure what for

She is mad but I am not angry
I am just sad that she once loved me

And now she is gone
At least for awhile
And so I move on
With a knowing smile

Because she will come back to me I know
She is mad but I love her: even so

II

Propinquity

Oakland

The urbanity
And the urbanness of the city
The humanity
Complicated ugly and pretty
Appeals to me in its diversity

I feel the feelings of millions of
People like me out looking for love

This is the meaning of propinquity

III

Shine

curiosity gave the cat nine lives

The informed enjoyment of the beautiful
Separates us from the merely dutiful

I want to shine no matter what is mine
Or not since mine is pretty much nothing
Except for some weed and maybe some wine
But I know that I can share anything
Being part of the great conversation

I want to be a butterfly and soar
Transcending tribe and naysaying nation
I find that I want a little bit more
Than the meretriciously mocking saws
Of false overlords who write all the laws
In their favor
With no flavor

The informed enjoyment of the beautiful
Separates us from the merely dutiful

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMIX








May 30, 2009, 3:17 am


Of These Our Mysteries

a love song

Burn my body on the beach
And my heart will burn true
To shine for all and each
Of the ecstasies of you
Burn me alive before I die
And burn yourself with me
Two torches blazing to defy
The dark which dares not see

Our mysteries held hidden now
Will bloom at midnight's noon
When one is more than two somehow
Beneath the waxing moon
We make two dreams come true to be
One with eternity
And I ask nothing of you
But that you let me love you

Burn me alive before I die
And burn yourself with me
Burn our bodies on the beach
And two hearts will burn true
Two flames combined to signify
One light which dares to see
To shine for all and each
Of these our mysteries

Of these the ecstasies of me and you

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMIX








May 28, 2009, 6:01 am


City Hall

They built their building all of glass
Then blinded us with blinds
To our reflections as we pass
These mirrors of their minds

Here is the power without the glory

The hidden meaning of it all
Escaped them long ago
No one can fight this city hall
At least they sure hope so

An ironic building of one story

Not iconic just ironic
Welcome to city hall

Home to the city's most exclusive club
The chamber of the star where power sits
The climate-controlled city council's pub

What they take in private the public gets
Back in the backside as some fine or fee
As they remind our freedoms are not free

A need-to-know basis pay-as-we-go
And where we are going they cannot say
They will not tell us so we cannot know
Since it is dark in there even by day

Crisp and abrupt closed and corrupt
Welcome to city hall

They built their building all of glass
Where kingpins stow their thrones
Behind their mirrors as we pass

But we might get in after all
When we return their stones

When we return their stones

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMIX








May 25, 2009, 9:56 pm


The Great Conversation

Midspring midmorning is to midwinter midnight
As a sandstorm and a snowstorm are both weather
As a flame and a flower a kiss and a curse
Analogous as each reflects its opposite

We weep not just at funerals but weddings too

Twin sibling rivals who meet their reflections in
Eyes which might despise their own blood by other skin
Find that fighting cocks are two birds of a feather

Two sides of one coin reconciled in one form fit
Together to cause what is to be to begin
The great conversation of this it with that it

They counter each other the while they coexist
Displace one another as what they most resist
Yet opposites balance no matter what they do
And the wheel keeps turning to turn the universe

Love becomes hate by darkness: but hate becomes love by light

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMIX








May 23, 2009, 4:25 am


Amica Nostra

Amica nostra: carissima mia...

(Leah)

I want you to know how happy you make me
Feel
When you bring the joy to swing reality
Real

I grope toward the future on hope from the past
With you the present as the gift of now
You teach me before we reach behind at last
Where moments meet at why-not and somehow
As we are now have been and will always be

Looking forward and back most fail to see
The here of now for looking too slow too fast

A couple of misfits who fit into one
Society of two
An association like the moon and sun
Which two as you and I
Shining just as they do
Reflecting each other across the sky
Embody and embolden me and you

We have known darkness and we have known pain
But we will never be afraid again

Amica nostra: carissima mia...

(Leah)

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMIX

this poem was first written in Leah's copy of my latest book, LOVE; I figured as long as I was writing in it anyway I might as well try and make it interesting








May 21, 2009, 9:31 pm


The Transcendence of Narcissus

my once and future autobiography

He seemed running away from something (hard)
Appeared in a hurry to get away
From those bodies buried in that backyard
Absent himself exhume himself daresay
And yet he never went anywhere at all
Then in November (like they all did) fell that fall

Risen as a daffodil in January
Though they call them all Narcissus here anyway
He came at last to embrace the temporary
Within his bulb and white roots in familiar clay
As he shone like the sun in his lightbearing hours
And so Narcissus escaped from the hothouse flowers

He transcended them it would be better to say
By starting where he ended but with higher powers
Of understanding as undemanding he lay
To slumber in the earth to bloom another day

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMIX








May 19, 2009, 8:25 pm


This is It

for Santa Ana College
on the twentieth anniversary of my induction into their Hall of Fame:
thank you for teaching me
Philosophy


This ground of being which we are seeing now
Is only such sight as the wound will allow
As it throbs to the rhythm of labor pains
Bleeding out the generations bleeding through
Needing everyone and no one seeding you
Feeding me only so that the bone remains
Here where both are lonely yet neither knows why

As someone as one who knows nothing explains
While punctured patterns in the stars pass us by
Witnessing our birth then watching as we die
By if-perhaps-and-but we do what we do
Though if-perhaps-and-but we must do something
Even we predestined failures want to try
Seeing successes succeeding at nothing

Failure and success on the ground of being
Are two broken pieces embraced in suspense
Of the balance of power of impotence
And since no one is really going anywhere
We strive to arrive when we have always been there
Where wound as womb and tomb two broken pieces fit
As healed at last through realizing: this is it

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMIX








May 16, 2009, 8:11 pm


Three Snapshots from Studio Lance

I

For those who might not get it yet should know
The reason I stay here so stubbornly
Is simply: This is Where I Am (you see?)
And being here see no reason to leave

This is an act of faith and I believe
May God help the damned fool who tells me go

II

Washing my clothes the hard way then hanging them on the line
Enlightened by marijuana then emboldened by wine

The most energy-efficient dryer these spring washdays
Is the sun: something which makes me believe that something stays

III

I am not only an "old soul"
I am one of the ancient few
One of The Ancient Ones: a role
Model mirroring old-soul you

Leah...

...Leah

(I am so glad to see you when I do)

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMIX








May 14, 2009, 7:08 pm


We Understand Us

for Leah

Enormous eyes uplifted spoke to me
As if with voices and faces their own
Like all the reflections in my mirror
And like all my daydreams of destiny
Sudden surprising when I was alone
And now one voice one face becomes clearer
As the lotus unfolds inside of you

I look at you and for the first time see
You bud into bloom as brightest and best
Your heart is strong and simply seeks to be

I believe in you that your heart is true
Living in darkness has sharpened my sight
Blindfolded but not blind I spy to see
Your spark in the dark through this lonely night
As coming to me inevitably
And only natural and only right
So I unbind my blindfold to see free

You make my heart strong and seek to be too
Enormous eyes uplifted speak to me
With voices our own when we are alone

You understand me and I am impressed
You saw me from across the great divide
And saw we are the same beneath the skin
Hearts bud into bloom as arms open wide
And lives are uplifted as joys begin

Enormous eyes found what nothing could hide:
We understand us (never mind the rest)

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMIX








May 11, 2009, 1:14 pm


A Letter to Leah

Dear Leah:

I want to let happiness happen to me
And yet I get in the way of its process
Though happiness happens mine happens to be
Always round the corner along with success
The problem I guess is I worry too much
From the constant attack of anxiety

The gift of empathy gives as given me
As selflessly as not for the self as such
Through me as to me as others feel its touch
Since I am not some self-healing physician
Merely some poet-musician-magician
More like the sorcerer's apprentice really

My friend since enemy of my enemy
Of all needful things what I have most need of
Is first to accept and then return the love
Of one willing to attack anxiety

Anxiety is anxious as anything
Confronted with love by harmony and peace
As our coming together wins our release
And this is what they mean when they say "meaning"
They say it means everything actually
I want to let happiness happen to me

As happiness happens you happen to be
One who makes me happy to be and to do
Like the way it feels when I feel me love you
Youth is not beneath me nor age above you
And here now somehow despite what might have been
What meaning means for me is that you love me

Time slipped away from me as I from it
I was always anxious trying to get
The pieces of these hours and days to fit
And I have never been able to yet

Somehow I feel like you know what I mean

Being an existentialist means to
Live in a state of arousal as you
As if existing through sheer persistence
Keep on insisting on your existence

It helps me be and do to be with you

I want to let happiness happen to me
And yet I get in the way of its process
Though happiness happens it happens to be
Always round the corner along with success

Love,

+Steven

A Private Postscript: Nobo

The hobos are a little bit too needy
A little aggressive as I start to think
Their problem is really that vodka they drink
Their begging gets a little bit too greedy

If I gave them good wine they might be just fine
Though I can hardly afford to share it now
And I hate to give them ganja anyhow
Since I need it at least as much as they do

I think drinking vodka skews hobos askew
Notice I carefully avoid saying "know"
But if they get pushy and they bother you
I will push back if they push as if I knew

Because I think a thing or two even so
Notice me carefully practice saying "no"

Love again,

+S

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMIX








May 2, 2009, 10:16 pm


The Beating Breathing Present

They were uncomfortable with silence
They heard time pass and in the passage death
Which they had seen in all its violence
Reminded with each heartbeat every breath
Agonies soon to be realities
Were coming to conquer their common sense
And comfortable commonalities

The ache at the end of life grows intense
Does not go away but makes us obey
Toward the disappointed appointed day
When the ache may make us better or worse

I saw them struggle with their certainty
They ached for order in their universe
Had sacrificed themselves from hope to faith
They heard time pass and in the passage death
Slow and silent and slouching up the stair
Would soon bear them up there or else down where
They worried about throughout haunted lives

Now I am comfortable with silence
I hear time pass and in the passage death
Which I have seen in all its violence
Reminds me how each heartbeat every breath
Presents a present of sufficiency
Now comes to conquer with uncommon sense
To make nonsense of commonalities

Except for death as sure as death is one of these
But after agonies it leaves as it arrives
The beating breathing present for the future from the past
A moment lived as though it were because it was the last

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMIX








May 1, 2009, 10:14 pm


The It to Get

for one who gets it as for all

You either get it or you don't
You will forget me or you won't
And we know right away because
Is only is: was only was

You either get it or you don't
When you get me and see then I get you
When we respect each other's truth as true
We function as something like family
Then (without the dysfunctionality
We have come to expect and to reject)
But will we forget? No we won't

The it to get is nothing less than all
Winter spring summer and most of all fall
Nor dare it be further explained than this
Suffice it to say: it feels like a kiss...

I love it that you understand
The likes of me and like my company

We are connected heart to hand
I feel my heart in yours and yours in mine
Human hands to hold the divine

As I am you so you are me
Remembered now as though from long ago

I understand and I want you to know
That the fact you are makes me want to be
As your existence coexists with mine

We sense and we are sensitive to it
Because we both get it and we do it

I love it that you understand!

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMIX








Apr 27, 2009, 7:14 am


Being

spero ergo sum

Because I hope I feel that I exist
Because I feel I love so I persist
Because I am thankful to think I think
That I am fortunate simply to be
Even though the being is only me

I could say spero ergo sum* and list
A lot of reasons why I hope despite
The feeling my life is lived at midnight
I hope I love I think and thoughts are free
Und (hofft die Liebe) es ist was es ist**

And I exist if existentially

As April is the cruelest month so
Sunday is the cruelest day I know
But this is since these are brightest and best
Like stars to light and lift me through the rest
To get to forget to get to a place
Where forgetfulness remembered as grace
Makes Aprils and Sundays the kindest then

Perhaps I could be and be happy when
I lose myself in being utterly
Perhaps I could be happy not to know
And be simply fortunate even so
Even though the being is only me

+Steven Curtis Lance

*I hope therefore I am

**And (hopes love) it is what it is

Copyright MMIX








Apr 24, 2009, 9:12 pm


Man Down: Death in the Breadline

among the homeless of the Plaza in Old Towne Orange California

What I heard was he died in the breadline
At St. John's there on Saturday morning
Where I stood once when he without warning
Fell on his face there yet got up just fine

I was relieved then so disbelieved when
At first I heard the worst by word one day
Of his homeless homeboy who hurt to say
Though in life our friend posed toughest of all
Once dead seemed just a broken victim then

We find it surprising when tough guys fall
When they turn out fragile like us instead
Then sometimes they never get up again

I told him what he knew that none is tough
Especially an exposed hairless beast
Who once rough and ready became just rough
The police said they were pleased he was dead
Falling filthy at the foot of the feast

Dressed like the rest in hollowed hallowed ground
Recatholicized hands pose as to pray
Putrefying in a more perfect way
His cause of death is really that he drowned

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMIX








Apr 23, 2009, 2:42 am


Gleaning Meaning

promises to keep in an uncertain hour

We stumble by our billions through this stammering
Stupefied by stupid sages into sadness
Leaving us left only yawning to yammering
No wonder the timid are tempted to madness

A paint horse run free from the carousel awhile
I feel no longer timid but crazily brave
And other carousel horses alongside smile

As I tempt and attempt to escape from this grave
I know nothing prevents me except perhaps fear
Pursuing my pursuit of immortality

I have written in my blood I must remain here
By simply defying a form of gravity
Hardly more feared thus more easily transcended

Escaping gravity in graying gravitas
My stammering and yammering days have ended
Going down without up is not what it once was

Before I knew better I went down for meaning
So far so long the wheel has turned me up again
If only here to the humble work of gleaning
The meaning of this pain for those who must remain

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMIX








Apr 19, 2009, 4:38 pm


At Least of Love

for each alone of everyone who knows my name as nothing less than Papa

Not a chain of bondage but of being
The uttermost we are and nothing less
Nothing to see but some way of seeing
As we are perfected by nothingness
We insist to be if imperfectly

If blood can curse then blood may also bless
This is my blood but this is your blood too

Unusual I know but family
Resemblances never kept from showing
I know I know nothing is what I say
(As all of you can tell from what I do)

Yet I gather that in a family way
Gathering becomes a way of knowing
Pregnant with the possibilities of
If not of faith nor hope at least of love

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMIX








Apr 17, 2009, 9:52 am


Heretic

I could not make nor would I want to take
You to the point of understanding how
Disappointed I guess it feels to be
Held to be a heretic just in case
You have not suffered this indignity

The point of understanding is a place
Like always everywhere but here and now
Where in the garden some might see the snake
I am but Adam and that not by choice

Yet since I am and since I have these eyes
To see the way I do and have this voice
To speak informed by these I realize
That someone has to say something somehow

And though few think but many think they know
Like them I know nothing and tell them so
That underneath it all we are the same
As victims of our own mortality
But I am not as they are not to blame

Each of us has a dream as I have mine
Live and let live and let the rainbow shine

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMIX








Apr 14, 2009, 9:20 pm


Delicious Danger

a spring love song for all the pretty girls

It is as if when I see you
I forget what I thought I knew
Everything happens as the first
Time anything has ever been

As always never best and worst
Felt as though for the first time seen
Through rainbowed bubbles not yet burst
By meaninglessnesses between

Therefore I am afraid of girls like you
Though this is a compliment you realize
To the grace by which you do what you do
That delicious danger I see in your eyes

A thrill of fear can be pleasant you know
If thrill should kill then what a way to go

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMIX








Apr 13, 2009, 9:27 pm


Sonnet for my Namesake Son

My friend is sick and cannot hear me now
And I despair that she may never hear
But she is strong and should come back somehow
To be as far as ever she was near

Yet there is something longer wrong with me
And I know what we chase must run away
But I tried to catch immortality!

Now I sort things toward the end of my stay

I feel the inevitability
Of the end of temporariness when
This man we know will simply cease to be
Which is why I love now instead of then

When I become burnt offering my dust
Becomes part of your backyard as it must

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMIX








Apr 12, 2009, 8:33 pm


Economy of Emotion

The salient feature of the family
I grew up in was something like resentment

There was much to be resented heaven knows

And I have always feared the presentiment
Of getting to be like them ultimately
Since even in a vacuum resentment grows
Along with everything else as we expand

In spite of this blood curse I resent nothing

My supply is only equal to demand
I cannot afford to resent anything

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMIX








Apr 11, 2009, 7:28 am


Spring Swing

Meeting and mating as Melville might say
Making it all up along the hard way
Gambling the evening to win back the day
Living and giving then taking it back
By getting each other into the sack
Getting depressed on the merry go round
Dancing with death into the underground

I know a place of peace
Where
I have sanctuary
But my own defamer
Whose head is extra small arms extra long
Is waiting and baiting
By way of disclaimer
There

Yet he will never stop me in my song
Not while your affirmation defends me
And like a mayfly cease
To be tomorrow as the very
Manifestation of what is wrong
But today his defamation offends me
Or rather bores me actually

I heard he met with an accident though

I get depressed where one and one stay two
I want to swing and go crazy with you

A dried strip of human jerky
Shrewdly seeing me as lost
Tried to carve me like a turkey
Never mind what it might cost
Me since she could neither care nor see
But I would not let her
Daresay I know better

I further daresay she will miss me

And in the end does anything mean something
Or does nothing mean anything after all?

The world is too big or else I am too small
Yet in fitting nothing I get everything
The world does not flatter
And size does not matter
I fit and I get what I can out of it

So there is where I would leave it today
But for the prestidigitation
Of what they call reality
The manual manipulation
Of how as what it means to be
Yet what it means I cannot say nor know

Therefore I need not leave it anyway
Accepting one and one will still stay two
In spring the thing I want to do is play
I want to swing and go crazy with you
Meeting and mating as Melville might say

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMIX








Apr 8, 2009, 7:03 pm


A Night Like This

for Leah and Jessie

The planes paint pink stripes on the sky
At sunset with their contrail tails
The moon remains when they pass by
The moon remains when all else fails

As all else fails I realize
The failure might be my
Myopia my dying eyes
My tears too fresh to dry

Only a failure to see
The mortality of me

The moon remains and makes
Me laugh at myself when I cry
The moon has what it takes

To lift my eyes for each a kiss
Both nurturing and cold

To bathe me in a silver bliss
The sun once gave when it was gold
To get me through a night like this

Not to laugh last nor yet laugh best but just
Take my place in peace at last in the dust
Whence I came so thence I am bound to go

I do not blame nor do I know
Anybody nor anything
I was just looking for meaning

And I have never found it

There seems no way around it
The moon remains when I pass by
The moon remains when all else fails

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMIX








Apr 6, 2009, 5:45 am


No Limit

A star sounds like a silver bell to me
Clean socks can be a form of ecstasy
As anything is if you notice it
And if you notice there is no limit
There is no limit at all anywhere
Unless you make one up and put it there

Pursuing wisdom while following fools
We put up too long with their made up rules

Now was fooled by then but not anymore
Now is what is and is what was was for
Then was against but now is all for it
As it is now when then would ignore it
Now knows but asks we find ourselves anew
First we must be to be able to do

There is no limit at all anywhere
Unless we make one up and put it there

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMIX








Apr 4, 2009, 11:48 am


Welcome

tayata om gate gate paragate parasamgate bodhi soha

The starting point is the vanishing point
The place where you disappear
Whether out on the street or in the joint
You are now and you are here:
Thoughts are free!
Be!
And thank you for coming to be with me

Here in this place where I do what I please
Where I think you might as well do it too
The cure for what ails you is the disease
I share where here is everywhere with you

Madness is neither sadness nor gladness
But both of these and in between as well
Like purgatory with a hint of hell
And a little leavening of heaven

Or if places like that do not exist
Then madness is the rainbow in the sky
A message too meaningful to resist
As if anybody should ever try

Here I exist
So why resist?

Here there is no prose
This is one of those
Places

And I never chose it to be this way
Because it is just this way anyway:
The outer extremes of inner spaces

Welcome to my poetry

The starting point is the vanishing point
The place where we disappear
Whether out on the street or in the joint
We are now and we are here:
Thoughts are free!
Be!
And thank you for coming to be with me

+Steven Curtis Lance



Copyright MMIX











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