Young at heart but slow to mature.

Michael didn't have a particularly large ego. No.
It's just that he had a hungry one, an ego that demanded
frequent nourishment to boost its confidence.
However, his ego fed itself on the wrong kind of nutrients.
It was not a balanced diet.
It foraged on the things which wiser egos might have left alone.
It was a grazer,
snacking on the sweet confectionary comfort food,
the food that tasted best.
Consequently, it was lacking
in the fruit, the fibre and the necessary protein,
so it never satisfied its appetite.
It felt lethargic, not achieving, missing its potential.
It wasn't bringing out the best,
it was letting down its host.

The host, being by nature a rather lazy individual,
tended to depend on his confidence being aroused
by excelling at the things he did best,
or perhaps if he were honest,
those that came the easiest and gave him lots of rest
Sadly, for his long term benefit,
that which came the easiest was short on long term gain.
For example, he’d discovered an ability from early on in life,
to skive off things he found were not entirely to his taste.
How does he get away with it, became the question
on the minds of parents peers and teachers.
The answer was of course he didn't for he paid the price,
the price of failure in the end.
Six years of youth were lost
because he hadn't pushed himself at school,
then years of catching up and hustling hard to make his money mark.

Not so long ago Michael began to discover
a surprising new talent for wooing the fairer sex.
Surprising that was, to him,
for he had not previously considered himself
overly successful or competent in that regard.
With this discovery came the gradual realisation
that he might be rather good at bedding them as well.
This growing confidence in his sexual artistry
came following a period of years
in which his several loves expressed their satisfaction
at the way he made them feel.
Being a tactile sensual and sexual sort of chap
who readily embraced most things of a hedonist nature,
and lazy with it, don’t forget,
he felt himself well suited to this role.
After all it was easy.
It required no study and the hours of work were flexible.
It was no great burden and he was his own boss.

Being someone who regarded himself
as a bit of a community spirited type,
he even began to feel a sort of sexual philanthropy come upon him.
It gave him great pleasure to dispense his largesse
among the female populace.
It made him feel useful in a funny sort of way.
A bit like an aid donor, bringing succour to the poor and needy.
And of course it fitted comfortably within his laissez faire philosophy.

Just as this particular talent of Michael's reached a peak,
he met and fell in love with the woman of his dreams.
Better still, she fell in love with him,
and so everything seemed to bode well.
Not only was she the woman of his dreams
but she shared his philosophy of free love.
Free that is, in the sense that the occasional sexual foray
could be tolerated and absorbed without precipitating any break up.
Perfect. Not that there was much chance of any foraying.
No, because Michael now felt perfectly happy and content
with his new love and wasn't looking any longer.
Retired he was. Finished with philandering.

Finished that is, until one year into the relationship,
and in the final hours of his Greek holiday
he fell under the spell of a moonlit Cretan night,
a surfeit of rhaki and a German tourist.
A female German tourist.
Not a great beauty, not your lithe leggy blonde type,
but pleasant looking enough to arouse his interest and set him off.
It began with quite innocent and honourable social intentions,
but soon gathered pace,
picked up a certain philanthropic impetus along the way,
and ended up in ignomy,
a tangled knot of naked limbs upon the furniture
of some deserted late night bar.
Very nice at the time, but mark the consequence.

For on his return to his one true love,
he found her troubled by his tale.
Not the tale particularly,
but the telling of it, and not the telling of it even,
but the manner of its telling,
for in its manner it seemed a little dubious.
Inconsistent she thought. I shan't go into the detail.
Michael ironed away the inconsistencies without much sweat,
for in truth, there had been none.
He had told his tale as accurately and honestly as he could
and felt no shame or guilt.

Within a few days of his returning
the two of them were once again locked firmly in each other’s arms.
He'd been surprised and thrown a little off his normal balance
by his love's reaction, but overall, on balance,
little damage done he thought, and no regrets.
His hungry ego had been fed, and gratified.
He'd ate his cake and kept it so to speak.

The story might have ended there
or at the very least paused for breath,
but quite by chance another tempting female snack appeared,
and so soon after the previous one. .

Hot on the heels of his Cretan escapade
there came another piece of news his lover had to face.
A chance meeting with a woman he’d known some time ago.
They’d swapped their numbers naturally and said they’d get in touch.
No this woman wasn’t any threat, a former lover past her prime,
but nonetheless, it couldn’t be denied,
he may well get up close and intimate,
if that’s where things should lead.
And lead they surely would.

So a date was made and off he went.
Several days before this though,
his lover had expressed her disapproval of his scheme,
and told him how she hoped he would relent.
His conscience told him that no harm would come
unless he got involved. Emotionally that is.
On the other hand, he bore in mind the feelings that she had,
and felt he’d rather not if he could possibly avoid it.
However, sad to say, but on the day
his ego got the better of his sober side and,
shoving it aside
it took its pleasure in the moment of it all.

His pleasure though was swiftly sinking
as he left her bed for home.
For on the journey home he started thinking,
thinking that the short term pleasure that he’d gained
was at the price of something longer term, truer and more meaningful.
Ok, he hadn’t broken any rules.
He was a free agent, at liberty to seize whatever moment came.
They had agreed on that.
But this had been premeditated,
and she had made her feelings known.
He began to feel the pain his love would suffer,
once she learned the truth.
And he had made a promise, to always tell the truth.

He made a resolution there and then to change his way of life.

Phewww....this one goes on and on!
Here an Ockhams Razor:

"Dont eat another rock or for the hole makes the whole island go down?

Love Jasper

PS: Sermons, to biblical for my viva la ground from Locus?
De ja Vous rules here!

Yes it does go on a bit doesn't it. It's not even a poem, just a piece of prose dressed up to look like one. I stuck in it, just in case there were people out there who had nothing better to do with their time.

With you on the biblical sermons. I'm not preaching to anyone here though. More of a confession really. Try reading my poem Heraklion which I posted earlier. It ties in with that. Very naughty. But I am trying to be good now.

Thanks for reading and making it to the end Jasper. How am I doing? Do I have any strikes left?

Now Now Ima or Errmma what'serrname, Strikes a metaphor: not scar tissue to be brought to bat here between us darling!
Life: they all take far too seriously.....see Iraq for details: see not Bush to not!
We're all here for a good time...not a long time...so enjoy as I lick or light you wick every now then to inspire your tail to burn its most brillant of owners onus...poetry? Love that Queen!
A burn, a smile, and a sweet little kiss....muuuuuuppphhhhh!

Love JAsper