Well, here is a rant I guess you could say. After having a session with my therapist the other day, I have been thinking. Basocally, about how I am a failure and I will never be able to live normally, withuot Ana. I dont know how to explain it in any way except that the ana is stronger then I am, and it always has been. Some days are so bad I cant bare to look at myself in the mirror because no matter what I look like, I am fat and I will pay in my head, for being fat. No matter how I feel or what otehrs say to me about my weight or health, nothing ever changes with me. I have been underweight ALL my life, forever. I have had some spurts of almost normal eating, but it ALWAYS comes back to this, the need to lose, the need to starve.
NOTHING EVER CHANGES...
Full Version: Same issue...different day
| QUOTE |
| NOTHING EVER CHANGES... |
Oh dear Dara...how I wish that I could make you feel better....
Living with ANA is HELL.....
(I will write you an e-mail.)
You are a wonderful friend(Please..never forget that,ok?)
You're a true friend, that I want you to know
our love for each other has helped us grow
we've been through some tough times
but we've made it through
'cause the only one I trusted was you
You've helped me through the sadness
and dried all my tears
you stayed by my side
when the world turned away
you helped me see the joy
when the skies were all gray
you were the rainbow at the end of the storm
you helped me be different
when I shouldn't conform
you held my hand when you knew I would fall
every laugh and heartache
you were through it all
I know I'm not always the best friend to you
I know I'm not perfect but this much is true
When life gets you down
and there's nowhere to turn
I'll help you out, I'll share your concern
I'll do my best to try to return every favor
when you think you'll drown
I'll be your life saver
even if we both go down
I'll pull us out when life pulls us under
I'll be the sun when there's
lightning and thunder
and when it's all over
and we've fought every war
there's one thing I promise
of this I'm sure
when the time comes
And we're put down to rest
I want you to know
My friend you're the best!
Oh Silke,
Thanks so much, you are so sweet! I dont know what I would do without your friendship!
Love,
Dara
Thanks so much, you are so sweet! I dont know what I would do without your friendship!
Love,
Dara
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