Why is it that so often you hear
"I don't want to play games"
yet it always goes on... yet is necessary in the 'mating rituals'
No girl should be too easy, she should play hard to get...
because if she was too easy to get, it couldn't possibly be worth it....
No guy should be too nice, it seems,
because if he was too nice, he sets himself up to be seen as 'less of a man'
everybody says that they don't like it, yet they like it less without it.... hmmmm.
Full Version: Playing Games
Yeah...I know...that is really strange.I wish I had the answer to why it is like that....
This may set me up to be 'less of a man', but I'll take that risk.
While I'll admit to putting a positive spin on things at the beginning of a relationship, I don't believe in playing games such as "the rules" (the ladies, and some unfortunate guys, know what I'm talking about. Stuff like, "if he calls after Wednesday, you are not available for a weekend date that weekend no matter what"). When you are deliberately scheming to cause an effect through emotional tactics, I think that moves into the manipulation side of the spectrum, and unless this is just a "love-em-and-leave-em" situation (which I'm not a big fan of on an emotional level) shouldn't be used for establishing a long term relationship.
While I understand the "if she was too easy to get, it couldn't possibly be worth it...." idea, let me throw another analogy out for consideration.
The Lottery. The lottery is easy, and I'm led to believe winning it is a pretty rare but worthwhile thing. I think we'd agree that those who win the lottery didn't "work" to get it. Maybe they played often, but no more (and probably less) than other players. The work comes after you win; in keeping and managing the money. Building a life that is better, but sustainable when the lottery commission stops mailing those checks.
If you start spending to much to fast, you'll be at the same or worse life style when the money runs out, however if you start smart and think about going the distance, you can make that money grow and build a legacy that can last not only your lifetime but for generations.
I see the relationship question in a similar light. Eventually you'll have to pay. If your significant other finds out about the manipulation and the games will that strengthen the trust in your relationship? I don't think so.
So while some "games" are ok, be careful how far they go, you could very easily destroy the future you were playing the games for to begin with.
<getting off soap box>
Thanks,
-Jon
(wow, if that statement doesn’t get me a dinner date I don’t know what will
)
While I'll admit to putting a positive spin on things at the beginning of a relationship, I don't believe in playing games such as "the rules" (the ladies, and some unfortunate guys, know what I'm talking about. Stuff like, "if he calls after Wednesday, you are not available for a weekend date that weekend no matter what"). When you are deliberately scheming to cause an effect through emotional tactics, I think that moves into the manipulation side of the spectrum, and unless this is just a "love-em-and-leave-em" situation (which I'm not a big fan of on an emotional level) shouldn't be used for establishing a long term relationship.
While I understand the "if she was too easy to get, it couldn't possibly be worth it...." idea, let me throw another analogy out for consideration.
The Lottery. The lottery is easy, and I'm led to believe winning it is a pretty rare but worthwhile thing. I think we'd agree that those who win the lottery didn't "work" to get it. Maybe they played often, but no more (and probably less) than other players. The work comes after you win; in keeping and managing the money. Building a life that is better, but sustainable when the lottery commission stops mailing those checks.
If you start spending to much to fast, you'll be at the same or worse life style when the money runs out, however if you start smart and think about going the distance, you can make that money grow and build a legacy that can last not only your lifetime but for generations.
I see the relationship question in a similar light. Eventually you'll have to pay. If your significant other finds out about the manipulation and the games will that strengthen the trust in your relationship? I don't think so.
So while some "games" are ok, be careful how far they go, you could very easily destroy the future you were playing the games for to begin with.
<getting off soap box>
Thanks,
-Jon
(wow, if that statement doesn’t get me a dinner date I don’t know what will
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