Julie and the precious five.

Julie’s performing oral sex on a strange man;
In a desolate alley, near by a garbage can.
Her ultimate master plan is to acquire money.
To chase away that back riding monkey.

She has five kids, by five different fathers.
The kids are in foster care,
Because Julie said, why bother?
It maybe a surprise, but she came from a nice family.
Their house was on a hill. Far removed from reality.

Her father was a lawyer, and her mother was an alcoholic
Housewife.
Momma resented Julie, all Julie’s chaotic life.
Julie thought of her self as a throw away person,
Because no one would listen to her hopes and dreams.
They definitely didn’t listen, when she was hurting.

So one day Julie was found half dead from an apparent over-doze.
Her eyes rolled back into her head. As blood dripped from her mouth and
nose.
So the story goes,
No one really knows if Julie’s still alive.
No one really knows what happened to the precious five.

This is insightful and unfortunately, a reality for so many in this world, just trying to survive , through what they consider the only ways to survive; losing themselves in the process,and forever, being lost.

One suggestion though, to aid in meter and flow...
Would be to shorten up the lines a bit and drop them down to make another line.
That way the longer lines, no longer overwhelm the write.



Julie’s performing oral sex on a strange man
In a desolate alley, near by a garbage can.
Her ultimate master plan is to acquire money.
To chase away that back riding monkey.

She has five kids, by five different fathers.
The kids are in foster care,
Because Julie said, why bother?
It maybe a surprise
but she came from a nice family.
Their house was on a hill.
Far removed from reality.

Her father was a lawyer
and her mother was an alcoholic
Housewife.
Momma resented Julie,
all Julie’s chaotic life.

Julie thought of her self as
a throw away person,
Because no one would listen
to her hopes and dreams.
They definitely didn’t listen,
when she was hurting.

So one day Julie was found half dead
from an apparent over-doze.
Her eyes rolled back into her head.
As blood dripped from her mouth
and nose.
So the story goes,
No one really knows if Julie’s still alive.
No one really knows what happened to.....
The precious five.



I enjoyed the story, though.

Blessed Be!
Aiyana

a story-based poem with a sketchy topic...very different. This was a good read.

By the way, is over-doze supposed to be overdose?

Yeah, Tg, I do believe so.
Aiyana

Good story.