I told you a while back that my sister and what she was going through. Well I had been teasing her before that how she was going to have twins and fun stuff like that just to tease. I found out yesterday all the problems she was having and the bleeding was because she had a miscarriage with one of the twins. I feel so bad about teasing her that she was going to have twins and I dont know how to talk to her about it I dont want to upset her. I feel so bad about ever joking around with her about that..

                                            Love ya,
                                            Stacy...

I understand, Stacy; it's always like that when something bad happens to a sibling, best friend, or someone like that with whom we have a relationship in which we kid each other.  But you've got to realize and remember always that what happened is not your fault.  Another thing to remember is that the kidding between you and your sister was entirely healthy and normal, and only symptomatic of the health and strength of your relationship.  People in dysfunctional relationships don't kid each other, they attack each other, insult each other; they fight, they don't joke.  You can always tell the difference.  It sounds like you and your sister have a good and healthy relationship.  Now is one of those times in both your lives when that relationship becomes most important.   Be there for her, love her, don't feel guilty; I'm sure she doesn't expect you to.  She is grieving now, and so are you, but now is the time to be close.  Remember it is better and easier for your sister because she has you; pain like that becomes unbearable alone.  So now is the time to come together and be closer than ever, and to realize your feelings of guilt are simply a normal part of the grieving process, the regrets, the what-ifs; but the most important thing between you is your love, and that is what will get you both through this difficult time.  Nothing is more healing to the heart than love.    

    Steven- Yes, I understand that, but it is still hard I am there for her all the way. It is so  hard to talk about it now though. Well as bad as this may be we (she) just needs to look at the up side that at least she didnt loose both of her babies she only lost one. Thanks for trying to help me out with things no matter how stupid they may be... :-[

                                    Love ya,
                                    Stacy...