I try not to love you,
But I can’t stop myself.
It hurts.
A soul hurt.
A pain that lies within my chest,
Like there is some creature where my heart should be,
Trying to claw its way out from within.
A million splintered shards of jagged glass tear me apart
Every time I hear your name,
And it is this pain that has convinced me
That there is no God,
For if he was truly our eternal loving father
There is no way he would continue forcing me
To endure this torment.
You are living proof that there is no God.
And yet I love you.
That’s the pure and simple truth of the matter,
Although we are hardly pure,
And out relationship has never been simple,
Has it?
I love you.
My situation hasn’t changed.
Yours however, could fill a novel.
You loved me,
You f**ked me,
You lied to me,
You dumped me,
You gave me false hope,
You let me crash down,
You loved me again,
And then…
You disappeared for awhile.
And then you reappeared,
Hating and lying to me,
And loving someone else.
And yet I cannot tell my stupid heart to look for another companion,
Because I gave you my soul.
You didn’t ask for it,
I gave it freely,
And because of the way the old magic works,
I cannot ask for it back.
It went freely,
It must be returned freely.
Like I said, I try not to love you.
I don’t like feeling this pain day in,
Day out.
I want to be free of it.
I want to finally be free of you.
But I can’t,
Because I know that the day you decide to love me again,
Will be the day
After the day
I finally give up chasing you.
And that makes me wanna wait
Just one more day.

I like this very much, Nevaeh / Heaven.

Thank you for sharing it.

Respect and solidarity,

+Stevie