Thump-Thump-Thump

He swings a tail like an orangutang
Knows it too as with a how-do-you-do
My cat Fred enters the room with a bang
Bearing the butt of an orangutang

Or if you need to drop off that last "g"
Should he seem more orangutan to you
He swings like an orangutan to me
And whether tang or tan we can agree
That I have my own pet orangutan
At least the hindmost portion anyway
And you could pet my orangutan too
Indeed he would be petted night and day

Though I am an inconsequential man
My cat wields a tail to mow us all down
An orangutangular terrorist
Hitting greens with a scythe of reddish brown
He could cut the grass or harvest the hay
And the government has him on their list

A machine of perpetual motion
A rattlesnake protruding from his rump
A tail to inspire appendage-envy
He is a weapon of mass destruction
And how the other cats wish they could find
The courage to be as brazen as he
If only a pleasant interruption
From rather more effete felinity

Ten years we have shared a fond devotion
In fact he is coming to see me now
Orangutang tail bringing up the rear
Simian yet so impressive somehow
So nice to have an orangutang here
Slapping me softly with a thump-thump-thump

They can bump and grind until they go blind
For want of this tail they are doomed to fail
To bump the way Freddie Noodles can bump
Slapping them silly with a thump-thump-thump

+Steven Curtis Lance



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