Venting, Help, You Pick Options

[angelroze]

my brother is being an a*shole, honeslty when he gets mad, he scares me, and i hate to say that bcuz i love him alot but its true, thats why i had to get off bcuz He wanted the fone, i can only be on the internet for an hour, ok a fuckin hour where he can have the fone and computer for however the F**K long he wants, my mom is being a real nasty b*tch about alot of things but then i feel bad about
that bcuz she can be nice and when she is nice i feel about hating her when she is mean at school i can not walk down the halls even like five goddamn feet with out someone making fun of me bcuz of some goddamn thing or another, i wanna leave that school so bad but of course even tho its most of the reason i wanna fuckin kill myself that doesnt mean its enuf of a reason to send me away some where. also thats prolly bcuz we dont have any money, my brother gets evry thing he wants but do i get anything? no i dont get anthing ok he has gurls every day of the week i cant even PAY a guy to kiss me in private whereas he can get any gurl he wants and then they MAKE OUt in front of me my mom and his frend and my frends, just a whole lot of sh*t is going i cant even explaion then this thing with trevor about him ignoreing me and sh*t it hurst and then robby saying that i was messed up in the head and i mean we are frends now but that doesnt help how it felt to have someone say aloud wat i thought it my head every fuckin nite of the week does it? no it doesnt maybe i dont have it horrible like other ppl have but this is all the sh*t i can handle. ok ppl over the computer are assholes too
and they dont care about anyone BUT themselves and i hate all this sh*t bcuz all my mom can say is that oh roze you dont have it bad, there ARE TONS of people worse than you, maybe so BUT that doesnt make it any easeir for me
Roze

[Cyn Lee]

Hello Roze,

My name is Cynthia, I can relate somewhat to your situation!!! One thing you have right is: Yes, there are people with worse situations, but that does not make your situation any less important, because it is what's causing you much conflict in your life. When I was your age, which was probably about 10 - 12 years ago, I did not have a curfew at all. I had to go to school and come straight home everyday. It sucked. I would go to the library, and get lost in books, because the internet was not a hot commodity back then All I can say, if you have a curfew try not to be home go out with some friends, you can probably get a part-time job to keep you occupied after school, I am just letting you know of some outlets so you don't feel stuck accepting the crap that your family is giving you because I can relate all too well!! But, I will tell you something no one ever told me, if things ever get violent, that is not acceptable!!!
Much Love,
Cynthia Lee

[angelroze]

thank you, yea i just feel like its not the end of the world and im stupid for feling the way i feel ya know? i mean maybe you dont know, but today this guy i talked to him once or twice about cutting my self and wanting to die and stuff and well he was all you need a shrink( i got mad at him) and i was all i do i have two and he was all for anger managment? and i was all no for suicde and he was all laughing at me, like honeslty Ha roze has two counslers for sucide, ha ROZE you're suicidle ok thats SO not even close to being funny and it serioulsy DId piss me off. and i dont know.. i dont think my hosuer wil get violent unless we get another dad..
rOze

[angelroze]

thank you.. thank you very much